Killing little by little

Cross posted from Facebook.

The latest breathless addition to the increasingly desperate media coverage regarding the terror in Orlando has been that the perpetrator (who I won’t name because I don’t believe that he should posthumously have the satisfaction of being world-famous) attended Pulse regularly, and that he spent time on gay dating apps, and so clearly he was a “closeted homosexual”.
A couple things.

Firstly, chatting guys up on Grindr or its ilk does not make you gay. I can’t believe that I have to point this out, but bisexual people exist. Just in case you were wondering. So let’s avoid erasing that particular wonderful and colourful segment of our community, shall we?

Secondly, so what if he was? Sometimes it feels like the only reason media outlets have to report this gutter-delving drivel is to try and fill in the gaps in an abysmal game of Mad Libs: “he killed [noun]s because he was [noun].” I see all these smugly satisfied talking heads saying “well of course he shot up a gay club, he was a closeted gay himself, it’s all violence with these gays, you can’t trust ’em” which is basically the same shit they’ll say about Muslims or refugees or Mexicans or whoever the minority is that we’re shitting all over this week.

If this guy did like dudes, and if that’s why he decided he needed to die and to take out a bunch of innocent people with him, that has nothing at all to do with his sexuality or the sexuality of those he killed and everything to do with the way sexuality is treated in our society. Think it through for a minute: if that was his motivation, then he learned as he grew up in America that it was easier to die and to destroy a whole bunch of other people’s lives than to tell his family and friends and community the truth about his sexuality. And that is not the fault of a community that would have loved him if he had come to us, that is the fault of the fucked up world that teaches that two men kissing is justification for mass murder.

I grieve for those who died, especially our queer latin@ brothers and sisters who have a whole extra pile of shit to deal with just surviving in our world where there are two reasons to hate them.

But I also mourn and grieve and scream into the wind for the children who will grow up in exactly the same community and being taught exactly the same lessons as this guy was.

Hate kills. Fear kills. Intolerance kills. Sometimes it kills a lot of people all at once, and everybody takes notice, and sometimes it kills little by little as innocent children grow into bigoted adults.

This is what I am angry about. This is what I grieve for. And if you are not angry and sad and hurt, why not?

Posted in: Blog

Written by David

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